|
How Squishy is your armadillo?
|
|
|
Welcome to the site dedicated to squishifying armadillos
|
This website is completely devoted to helping people make their armadillos squishy. We have a picture here of our mascot Funky the armadillo but he is not squished because he has magical powers, the same goes for his friend below him, Lumpy the armadillo. If you know of any armadillos that are not squishy enough I highly recomend that you stay here. We are not insane I repeat we not insane we love armadillo. Our goal is to make the world a squishyer place for all of armadillo kind. This site provides a useful database to aid in the squishification of your rodent friend. At this point you are probably wondering how one squishes an armadillo anyway. Well the truth is we don't know, we are on drugs.
|
|
|
|
|
The all important steps of squishifying armadillos
|
STEP#1: PREPERATION FOR SQUISHIFICATION
This is a vital step for anyone attempting this delicate procedure. You see it is crucial that your armadillo is aware of it's impending squishification or it may not squish correctly. if you do not repeatedly inform your armadillo it may require therapy after this operation.
STEP#2: METHODS OF SQUISH
The possible methods of squishing are virtually limitless. We can offer only a few methods, these are our personal favorites. One of the most efective methods for squishing armadillos(or anything else for that matter) is letting John Nary sit on it. Suprisingly microwaving your armadillo has the same effect(we have a crack team of scientist researching the microwaved armadillo phenomonon). For all you uncreative couch potatos you can just use a sledge hammer.
STEP#3: POTENTIAL USES OF ARMADILLOS
One of the biggest advantages of squishing an armadillo is the fact that it can now fit into places normal armadillos can not. Squished armadillos can fit into things like soda cans, bellybuttons, human noses etc. Squished armadillos are also light and compact, that makes them the ideal travel rodent.
|
|
|
|
|
Delve into the twisted minds of this sites' creators
|
This site was made by Isaac Crosson, Ryan Okamoto and Pace the superparakeet.
Ryan has some kind of armadillo fetish so he asked Isaac to create a web page dedicated to squishing armadillos. This distracted Isaac from his normal agenda of growing his hair to look like abnormal animals so under the supervision of Pace and with some help from Ryan this page was born.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
